Moms have a super tough job. There’s no on-boarding process, there’s no manager to tell you if you’re doing it right, and everyone is a critic. It’s all volunteer, you won’t be paid. You don’t go to get a four year degree to help you understand your new job, and there’s no prior job-skill experience for motherhood. It is something that we choose and then the weight of it gets thrust upon us in our most vulnerable moments. It is a thankless job and one that never really gets the credit from society that it deserves. Why is that?
As a mom, I struggle with the fact that there is no concrete tangible reward for what I do. When I go to work, if I do a good job, perform well, and put in the effort, I will most likely move up and be promoted. I will maybe even get a raise. My superiors might even tell me that I handled a situation well — there would be appreciation and thanks. But when I’m at home and clean up a dirty diaper, there’s no fanfare. When I finish what seems like the 100th load of laundry, no one is doing “the wave”. It’s simply expected as, “this is what you do”, “this is motherhood”.
In the working and professional world, we have something called LinkedIn. It’s a great networking tool that helps other professionals to connect and observe others’ skills. They can list all the places they have worked, projects they have been involved in, and recommend others for certain positions. But there is NO LinkedIn for motherhood. In a world where accomplishment and professionalism is so celebrated, why is it that one of the most tough and necessary jobs gets little to no recognition?
I think sometimes this is why moms have a hard time. They have a hard time staying home or working because they never feel like they are truly enough. The world says you need an impressive LinkedIn profile, you need ten degrees and glowing recommendations. So we find ourselves tired, burnt out, and feeling inadequate.
What’s the solution? How do we get the recognition we crave while also not neglecting our roles as mom/wife/employee? I think we start by making ourselves happy first. I think we start by understanding we are enough as we are. I think we start by recognizing our own self worth and letting the world see how necessary we are. I think when we start believing we are impressive, society will join us. By filling our cup, we can then show others our dexterity.